My Story: Why am I fat?

“If ever there is tomorrow when we’re not together… there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we’re apart… I’ll always be with you.”
– Winnie the Pooh

My journey into the diet world, began in my late teens. I remember being chunky, having thunder thighs, and not super thin. I wasn’t obese. However, I tried Slim Fast, I was working out – Sweating to the Oldies, helping mom do her work outs while she was on Nutrisystem.

College Years

Enter College – new food, new challenges, new people. I gained the freshman 15. Tried to lose the weight over the summer, by rollerblading up and down the street, trying to get into shape, and not changing my diet too much.

Sophomore :(1994-1995)

Back to college, as a Sophomore, move into an apartment. Gained another 15 pounds. I did not work out but just walking to class and working all the time. I was working three part time jobs to pay my rent and bills. November of 1994, I became engaged to my boyfriend.

Junior Year (1996-1997):

After getting engaged, we moved from an apartment with a roommate, into our own apartment. I was working multiple jobs, attended school full-time, and struggled financially. My fiancée/ husband #1, started verbal and financial abuse. I struggled to make car payments, rent, and electric, and insurance. My fiancée was given $350 per month by mom and dad, so he could “concentrate” on college. I gained weight eating crap because of stress and my schedule. Classes from 8- 2, work from 4- 11 Pm almost every night.

Senior Year – College ( 3 years: 1998-2000)

I was married. I weighed approximately 160 lbs. Still working full-time and fighting to graduate with a BS in Computer science. My husband was working full-time, only weekends. He dropped out of college. He was working for 3 years, before he was fired.

Adulting 101: Married 3 years

Moved to Portland after graduation and getting my first real job. My husband is now unemployed. He did not collect unemployment and not looking for work. He had his driver’s license, suspended, due to a DUI for 3 years. I am gaining weight from eating garbage. It was a way to cope. I was wondering, why with a budget, I never had enough money… and I’m getting heavier. I tried just working out at the apartment gym and didn’t really lose a lot of weight.

9/11 happened. I was on my way to training at my new job, when news broke across the radio. This is when I met my best friend in the world, and the night we became sisters. She lived in New Jersey and was also a Bon Jovi fan. We met in the fan club chat room. — continued in another post.